Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get surgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

What do you call a fish that is missing an eye. fsh.

Have you heard the story of the empty room? Theres nothing in it.

How many Jews can you fit into a car? About 5 or 6. It depends on the size of the car.

How did the happy clown die? Testicular Cancer.

Wikipedia has no entry on "gullibility."

What happened to the dying kangaroo? He died What animal is not in the lion king? Kangaroo --why? Because he died...

uhh i dont feel like writing a joke

Yo mama so fat she has an increased risk of blood clots!

Roses are red, Violets are pencil, this poem makes no sense, refrigerator

A man falls into a lake but no one is around to help him, luckily the man can swim so he got out of the lake and went home feeling embarrassed

Chapter 6 : The pimp ``scooby`` tells how delivered the poor young people to people with money.

Why couldn't the 10 year old see the Pirate Movie? Because he was dead...

womens rights

What's the Capitol of Washington dc? W

Your mom is so fat, when she sat on a lump of coal she didn't realize she sat on a lump of coal.

So two Jews walk into a bar... Its nice that they take missionary work to new heights

Why did the girl fall off of the swing? They threw a fridge at her.

Why couldn't the boy see his sick mother? Because he was blind

A woman goes into a butchers with her baby. She says "I live a few doors down and my scales are broken, do you mind weighing my son?" The butcher takes the boy away and a short while later returns holding a dripping bag. "He's 17lbs two ounces" he informs her, as his colleague brings the boy to the counter safe and well.

What's black and white and red all over? A black, white, and red painting.

A black and a mexican start a resturaunt it turns out to be a big success and they make a chain and profit from it.

what's funnier than a dead baby? a lot of less tragic things

What kind of parrot can't mimic human voices? One that's just had it's vocal chords illegally harvested and sold on the black market

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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