Whatsthe best way to kill a blonde? Tell her theres a scratch and sniff at the bottom of the pool.

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What do you get when you cross a cat with a log? I think the better question is why are you mixing those two things together?

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While on a business trip, a Jim got a call on his cell phone. It was his best friend. He was informing Jim of his wife's death in a terrible train crash. She didn't die on impact, but her legs were cut off by metal debris from the train car in front of her. She fought against the pain and used a shirt she found from a dead body to stop the bleeding. She managed to drag herself to the nearest road crossing, where someone drove her to the hospital. Despite her efforts to survive and the surgeons efforts to save her, she died that night as a result of excessive blood loss. After he hung up, Jim turned up the ringer volume on his phone because he couldn't hear it very well when it rang.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? -Hey! Where's my tractor?

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What's funny about suicide? Nothing, that's horrible.

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What if I told you that our role our "little team" is not as little as you think?

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Q: What kills millions of people each year and sneaks up behind you unexpectedly? A: HIV/AIDS

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? The wind. The wind who? ...

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How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Who knows? They all just sit and bitch about it.

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World Peace

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Chuck Norris died.

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i said why are you disliking me he said its anti joke

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Q:What are black people so good at basketball? A: Because they are black!

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Chaney is a dumb b****

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what happened to the polish man that was running late for work he got their late apparantly

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what do you get when you mix a bever and a racoon? A bevecoon!

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What is a ghost's favorite dessert? Nothing. Ghosts do not exist, thus they cannot eat dessert.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I was dropped on my head as a baby, kjhgfiehcgbfbjebfiuheggfcug

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I was once raped by an Asian... it didnt hurt

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I was purple once. I took a shower later that day.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Due the limited cognitive ability and a lack of critical thinking skills, the chicken mistakenly ventured across the road in search of grain. Luckily the chicken was not injured on this occasion, however other chickens may not be so lucky in the future.

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what's worse than one scoop of ice crea falling on the floor? - the holocaust what's worse than two scoops of ice cream falling on the floor? - nothing

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whats worse than bitting into a apple a finding a worm? bitting into ur apple an finding out u have just killed noddy who was hiding in ur apple

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Farmer Ned chased his chickens before they laid their eggs, because he likes his eggs scrambled.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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