Why couldn't Larry walk his dog? Larry doesn't have a dog.

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Knock Knock Come in, the door's open.

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What's black, white, and red all over? A penguin getting crushed by a sledgehammer.

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What do you call a man with no brain? dead.

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A black man and an asian woman have a baby. Then a hispanic and a native american have a baby. Their babies have a baby. What is the baby? Society's worst nightmare.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels

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What's brown and sticky? -A stick.

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How do you get a movie star to go out with you? Blackmail.

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What did the robot do when a person was shot? Nothing, it wasn't programmed for that situation.

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What's better than Westboro Church? Committing over 9000 sins.

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What happens when you stab a black man? An equal race rights protest.

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How is the difference between a door? Its a chicken, because they don't have wheels.

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What do you call 10,000 lawers jumping out of a plane? A good start.

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You're momma's so fat, that I just wanna go over there and make hot passionate love to her. What? I'm a chubby chaser.

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How many jews can you fit in a car? That depends on the volume of the car and the size of the people involved - different cars are of different sizes and can fit a different number of people. For instance, you could probably fit more than 20 midget jews in a van but you could probably not fit as many overweight jews in a coupé. However if you put some effort into getting as many standard sized people, in this case jews for reasons unknown, into a standard size sedan you should be able to fit about seven or eight in the car itself and one in the trunk, making a total of nine or ten.

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so he says "aaahhh". then i threw a fridge at him

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A man walks into the corner of a table and bruises his leg. The bruise continues to be there for about 3 weeks.

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Microsoft Windows

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How many perverts does it take to screw a lightbulb?

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What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo.

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69

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it noticed that there may be foodstuffs on other side.

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What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAA

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An Irishman walks into a bar. He quickly exits as he thought it was the Polish restaurant located directly nextdoor. He then enters the Polish restaurant and orders a delicious lunch. He tips his waiter 20%.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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