What do you call a box with a dead Jew in? A coffin.

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What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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What do you call 10,000 lawers jumping out of a plane? A good start.

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What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo.

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69

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Why did the unicorn cross the road? i dont know. unicorns arent real

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what does the doctor say to the patient. you have cancer

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What happened to the latino and asian man in math class when they had a test? They both recieved exceptional scores as they both helped each other study the night before.

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A woman gets in her car to drive.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a house red. Babies, especially dead ones cannot paint.

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Whats worse than a bunch of teen-agers throwing kitrens at my house I didn't save them because I thought they were jehovahs witness's

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it noticed that there may be foodstuffs on other side.

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I'm not as random as you think i salad.

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How do you have sex with an amputee? stick it in the eyes

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What did the Sony guy say when he hit the golf ball? PS FOUR!

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How do you get a baby out of a blender? With tortilla chips.

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What if I told you that our role our "little team" is not as little as you think?

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If John has 32 candy bars and he eats 28, whAt does he have? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

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Roses are red Violets r blue My name is Dave Microwave

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2 peanuts were walking down the street, one was a salted .. the other was raped

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Roses are red, Violets are not blue, they're violet, which is why they're called violets.

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Baseball

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "Sorry sir we're closed" So the man goes: "Oh, okay. I wasn't sure if you guys were open till' 10pm tonight" and the bartender goes "No, thats only on the weekends" The man thanks the bartender and proceeded to leave the bar. He now knows the arrive earlier the following day.

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There is a secret society known as Grandma Elbow. What happened to the boy who tried to leave it? All of his limbs were ripped off and fed to a man eating shark by the name of Nigel Tommy Baker. It didn't hurt that much because the boy was forced into eating the waste products of a donkey before this happened. NEVER LEAVE GRANDMA ELBOw!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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