1, 2, buckle my shoe. 3, 4, shut the door. 5, 6, I'm gonna to cut you in your sleep.

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Penis.

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How is the difference between a door? Its a chicken, because they don't have wheels.

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Whats black and white and red all over? A penguin in a blender

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How do you get a baby out of a blender? With tortilla chips.

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A man goes to the doctor suspecting he might have erectile dysfunction. The doctor raises an eyebrow and asks, "Does it come up a lot?" "No."

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why did the guy drop his umbrella........ because he was getting raped.

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Why did the kid get athsma? Genetics.

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Roses are red Violets r blue My name is Dave Microwave

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yo mama is so fat, she should seriously consider gastric bypass surgery, morbid obesity is extremely detrimental to one's health

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Q.What's worse than running over a dog on the road? A.9/11

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A man. That is all.

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Whats9+10 19

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The President, the Pope, and a small child are in a plane when the pilot announces that they are about to crash. The plane hits the ocean. They quickly remember that there is a life jacket under their seats and they promptly put it on, but wait to inflate it (by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs) it until after exiting the cabin.

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Why did James come back to drive the boat again this year? Because he likes driving boats and towing passengers

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown suit

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A girlfriend scolds her boyfriend for "sitting on anti-joke all day." He then explains how it is impossible to sit on something that exists purely in digital form and instead noted it would be more correct to say sitting at a desk all day. She complied and saw the error of her ways.

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Chuck Norris died.

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How did the people get into the pyramid?? They didn't

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Albert and Hunter, Forever in love < 3

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If god gives you lemons You find a new god.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupting doctor. Interrupting doct- You have cancer.

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What do you call a man with short legs? Whatever his name is

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ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSUCKMYDICK

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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