Two drunk men were in a bar fight, they smashed beer bottles on each others heads and walked away because it hurt.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

roses are blue violets are red I am dyslexic and possibly a Jew EJ

thumb_up thumb_down +39

whats stupid and likes dumb jokes? you.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What's the difference between a Jew and a black person? Black people are good at running.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What's funnier than the Holocaust? Most things, as the Holocaust was a terrible tragedy.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What do you call a Mexican baptism? A blessed occasion.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

How many jews can you fit in a car? That depends on the volume of the car and the size of the people involved - different cars are of different sizes and can fit a different number of people. For instance, you could probably fit more than 20 midget jews in a van but you could probably not fit as many overweight jews in a coupé. However if you put some effort into getting as many standard sized people, in this case jews for reasons unknown, into a standard size sedan you should be able to fit about seven or eight in the car itself and one in the trunk, making a total of nine or ten.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

One time I went into a haunted house. It was just pretend ghosts but then I saw a real ghost there. It was scary.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Two drums and a cymbal fall down a cliff. Ba-dum pssh.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What do you call a lawyer who came from the ghetto? Someone who did quite well for themselves despite coming from a tough area.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why is Digimon better than Pokemon? It has a better story and character development.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What's funny about a Jew, a Muslim, and a Christian going over the edge of a bridge in the same car? Nothing, they all died

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What did Sarah Palin say to her daughter on Christmas? Merry Christmas

thumb_up thumb_down +33

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

A man is driving home from work. he realizes he left his suitcase back at the office. he turns around and drives back to the office. he walks in the office and grabs his suitcase, and as he's walking out he's stopped by his boss. his boss simply asks "what are you doing in the office at this time, Eric?" the man replies to his boss " sorry sir i was just grabbing my suitcase as i forgot to bring it as i was leaving work" his boss lets him pass " okay Eric, have a good night" the man get back in his car and drives home. but on his way home a pedestrian runs in front of the road. the man runs him over unintentionly. the man is jailed with manslaughter for 4 and a half years

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why did the blind man commit suicide? Cause his wife was so ugly he went blind and become depressed a shot himself...twice.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Do you know why your mom is so bold? Becaus she's got cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Roses are red, Violets are pencil, this poem makes no sense, refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down +31

*Knock Knock* Who's there? Nobody. Go make some friends.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

what do you call a slave with a dream of being free? whatever his name happens to be

thumb_up thumb_down +29

I'm not as random as you think i salad.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Where did the 5 gay guys go? One direction

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why did the little girl fall down She was shot in the leg

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops