People are like cats, they both die when they're suffocated

What is the main contrast about different banks? None, they all take your money!

A man, a woman, and their son were happily going out for a nice family dinner. The family they ate wasn't so happy.

There once was a man from Nantucket. He had a huge appendage; his arm has been swollen from birth. What a bummer

nock nock who's there i eat mop i eat mop ho i didn't know you eat your poo. the wedding is off and go **** yourself in a hole!!

What do you call a Mexican and a Black man on the moon? Astronauts.

why did the boy have no friends ? Because he lived in a small cottage miles away from any civilization with his overly strict parents who would not let him see the daylight and deprived him of any kind of childhood, he has no social skills and does not know how to interact with other human beings at no fault of his own. he is also dead

The President, the Pope, and a small child are in a plane when the pilot announces that they are about to crash. The plane hits the ocean. They quickly remember that there is a life jacket under their seats and they promptly put it on, but wait to inflate it (by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs) it until after exiting the cabin.

If you're a man, why don't you want to drop the soap in prison? The shower floors are disgusting and carry bacteria. No way would any person -- man or woman -- want to touch it.

Mary had a little lamb, the doctor fainted.

How do you kill one Jew. A gun. How do you kill a thousand Jews. With a millon angery germans.

How did the people get into the pyramid?? They didn't

Why did the baby cross the street. Because he was attached to the chicken.

World peace

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

We're out of mustard, so in your sandwich I used some yellow liquid dripping from a dying rhinoceros.

Jim fell of his bike, wanna know how. Someone threw a car at him. Knock knock, who's there, not Jim

Whats black and has wheels a black man i lied about the wheels

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What do you call a man with short legs? Whatever his name is

I told my friend a joke. He didn't laugh, I asked why. He said he was autistic and he does not understand humor.

I walked in on my daughter masturbating. The whole ordeal was very uncomfortable, but I sat her down at the dining table to discreetly explain the necessity of locking doors.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because its coop was on fire.

women leaving the kitchen

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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