What's worse than finding gum stuck on the bottom of your desk? A clown following you around carrying a shotgun and throwing toothbrushes at you.

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Why did the man steal 2 watermelons? He was a shoplifter and had a background of crime

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what do you call a martial arts instructor with a medical degree who's name is Richard? Craig... just kidding, Richard

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what's the funniest anti joke? not this one

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Drop a brick on her face.

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you know what hurts.... PAIN

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what do you call a black guy in a cop car a cop

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he wanted to.

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A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

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People talk about how there grandparents was in the holocaust well my grandpa was to he died. How he fell off the guard tower.

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A priest, a rabbi and a captain are in a sinking ship. The rabbi says let's save the children. The captain says f*ck the children. The priest days do we have time.

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What's the best position to be in while being attacked by a bear? invisible

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What's samller than a table but can't go under it? A baby with hay fork in his back.

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nice shorts.

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What's the difference between a Jew and Hitler? Well, I asked you so I don't know why you said "what?".

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RULES: #1) have fun #2) safety first

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If a tree falls in the woods, and no one is around to hear it - Is there still a woman in the kitchen?

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Yo momma's so fat and thank god because I'm a chubby chaser.

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you mother is so stupid that it takes her quite a while to understand jokes

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Have you heard the story of the empty room? Theres nothing in it.

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Jacob Edwards has friends.

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What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAA

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What is the difference between a Ferrari and a dead hooker? One is a car and one is a human being.

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What can a bench do, that a south African man cant? Support a family. (I HOPE THAT WASN'T RACIST)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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