A whale walks into a bar, everyone says Hey, Ashely!

guns don't kill people. casey anthoney kills people.

What does a Jew do when he sees a masked man at his door? He grabs a phone to alert the police and hides in his bedroom.

Two blondes walk into a bar. There is a fat man there, but nobody talks to him

Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow You thought that this would be romantic, but alas, it is only gardening facts

A black man, a jew and a racist walk into a bar, The racist proceeds to be a racist

Why do witches ride on brooms? Because they have magical powers!

If life gives you melons, you might be dyslexic

Justin Bieber is a talented singer.

Why does my friend pick up trash? Because he is a garbageman

Knock Knock. Who's there? Guitar. Guiar who? Violin.

Q. What gets louder as it gets smaller? A. A baby in a paper shredder

If I crash my car, how many trees does it take to cover my yard in orange juice, yellow, because a cat pissed on my foot.

How does a plumber cross the street? Using his legs

What do you get when you cross an owl with a bungee cord? ...an owl with a bungee cord.

what do you call a cat that talks a talking cat

KNOCK-KNOCK Who's there? There's a man after me, I was just walking down the street and he started chasing me! I'm scared, I don't know what he'll do. Let me in goddamnit! There's a man after me I was just walking down the street and he started chasing me I'm scared I don't know what he'll do let me in goddamnit who?

What do you call a guy who acts straight but is really not? Verl.

A 36 year old Canadian woman.

How do you get all the apples off of an apple tree? You pick them

Your mom is so fat, when she sweats, it is more than the normal amount of sweat.

Haha

a man sees a monkey playing the drums at first he thought it waz the guy in the monkey suit that plays the drums but on closer inspection he sees that it is in fact a real monkey on that note he tries to befriend the monkey but the monkey soon tore the man into pieces

This one time, at band camp we played in a band

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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