A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?", laughs at his own joke, then calls animal control.

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I used to be an adventurer like you, Until I lost both my arms.

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why did the man cross the road? Because he needed to cross the road to reach his destination that was across the road

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Knock Knock.... Knock Knock.... Knock Knock.... I guess no ones home.

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What's the difference between a black guy and a picnic table? Many things, really. Beginning with simple structural features such as the number of legs, of which there happen to be four on a generic picnic table, and two on a human being. One might observe that a typical african american male is between 5'8" and 6'2" in total length, whereas a picnic table, being made to support 6-8 people will generally be slightly longer. A black guy will generally be pictured standing upright. A picnic table is usually horizontally laid out upon a flat surface. The former is living or dead, the latter is usually nonliving, processed wood or metal. The former may move about from day to day of its own accord, the latter is completely stationary, and indeed very difficult to relocate, etc.

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What do you call a lady that cleans? A cleaning lady.

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wanna hear a joke yo mamma just died

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Why did Captain Hook die? He wiped.

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Whats purple and fluffy? Purple Fluff

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Whats red and hairy ? A carpet !

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Why doesn't stevie wonder play snooker? Because it's not very popular in the US.

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Did you hear that Hellen Keller went driving? Now she's also paralyzed.

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas. A pool.

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What's invisible and smells like carrots? Carrots! ... well if they were invisible..

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Why din't the boy get a Christmas present? Because his dad go hit by a bus.

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Do you know what Ethiopian food tastes like? Neither do they

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whats worse than the halocaust? disney channel.

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Two drunk men were in a bar fight, they smashed beer bottles on each others heads and walked away because it hurt.

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I told a woman to make me a turkey sandwich. Of course she complied since I was at Subway.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To mourn the loss of his daughter who died due a fatal car crash, caused by him while he was driving. across the street

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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What did Sam say when the basketball hit her face? Ouch.

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What is worse than a Catholic priest being caught red handed raping 7 kids? 1. Thou shall not steal. 2. Thou shall be kindeth to thy neigbour... 3. Not attending to church is a sin... Moral: Catholic priests need to get their priorities straight... or gay, just not pedo!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops