- I did your mom last night! - Thanks, Dad.

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What's long, hard, and full of semen? a penis.

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whats worse the being in a car crash? finding out that your mother and father were in the other car and were fatally injured.

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What is 69? A number that is before 70 and after 68

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whats worse than bitting into a apple a finding a worm? bitting into ur apple an finding out u have just killed noddy who was hiding in ur apple

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Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

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What did the bartender say to the midget as he entered the bar? Nothing besides attempting to serve him in the same manner as any other reveller whilst attempting to disguise his sense of pity for the midget's debilitating and somewhat stigmatised condition.

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What would you do if you're eyes just suddently exploded? You would never see again.

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Why did Suzy fall of the swing? -she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not Suzy

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What does a girl get from a dead MAN:)?? Nothing he is dead.

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How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face.

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Q: What's funnier than 24? A: 25.

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A small child and a pedophile are walking hand-in-hand through the dark, creaky woods. "Mister," says the small child, " I'm scared." "YOU'RE scared?" says the pedophile. "I'M the one who's gonna have to walk back alone!"

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A man claims to own a talking dog. A skeptic approaches the man and his dog and asks for a demonstration. The man asks his dog, "How does sandpaper feel?" The dog says, "Ruff!" The skeptic is not convinced. The man then asks his dog, "Who is the greatest baseball player of all time?" The dog, who like all dogs cannot fully comprehend human speech, proceeds to lick his balls.

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me:I will trade you 5 dollars for 10 dollars blond: Okay! me: ...

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Albert and Hunter, Forever in love < 3

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What's the best part of having a doctor for a best friend? The sex.

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Wy did Bryan eet his Dumbelllle? Anderson fell asleep again

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how do you kill jesus? with a knife

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what do you get when you cross a daniel lesiak with nothing? Answer - A gay homosexual

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Why is the boy severely mentally scarred? He got raped.

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What do you call a blue duck that speaks? A dream.

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roses are red, violets are blue, hey reed and steven, we should hang out

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Obama enters a KKK meeting Obama: Oh sorry I thought this was the Kentucky Fried Chicken... the font was so small so... as he starts backing off scared... KKK: leader, of course Mr.President, feel free to come again anytime! Moral: Kings Knocking Ketchup is actually a nice place if you not unlike me enjoy ketchup...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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