What did the lover say to his lover? I love you

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whats worse than your brother dying in a car accident? finding out the rest of your family was in there

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A Horse walks into a bar. Bartender:why the long face? Horse:I have terminal cancer.

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What do you call a fat legless over weight black man called Tom. Tom.

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What is the best thing since sliced bread? Sliced butter.

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What do you get when an Asian and a black person have a baby? Black and yellow. Black and yellow. Black and yellow. :)

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Knock knock who is there ? i'm an orphaned, sir can you tell me why did you write who "is" instead of who's ?? because than i will have to use the (') key and its very far not to mention that i have to use the shift key do u want a pizza ? how much ? 50 cents ? get the hell out ? im not even in yet !

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Why did the airplane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Some people are like Slinkies: they get really boring after a while.

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Why didn't the boy run the marathon? He was cripple.

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Brian Singmaster. Look him up, he's cute.

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Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy but get in the van

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Q: What's the similarity between puzzles and women? A: Prior to the 1920's neither had the right to vote.

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A Jew, a Mexican, and a Black guy all walk into a bar. Bartender says: "Get the f*ck out."

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yo mama's so ugly, it affects her self esteem.

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Why did the elephant fall into the hot chocolate? It fell off the marshmellow.

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why couldn't the blonde change the light bulb? because he chose the wrong sized screwdriver from his tool box

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Why do Jewish people where hats in church? They feel there head will often get cold

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How do you make a mail man cry? Run him over with a forklift.

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why did the 1st koala fall out of the tree ? it was dead why did the 2nd koala fall out of the tree ? it was hit by the first koala why did the 3rd koala fall out of the tree ? it thought it was a game why did the 4th koala fall out of the tree ? it was hit by a fridge why did the 5th koala fall out of the tree ? it was inside the fridge

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- How do you keep an idiot in suspense? - How? -......

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

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How do you make a professional wrestler cry? You could stab him repeatedly with a box cutter and demand his social security number, but I wouldn't suggest it. He would most likely beat you up.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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