A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "Sorry sir we're closed" So the man goes: "Oh, okay. I wasn't sure if you guys were open till' 10pm tonight" and the bartender goes "No, thats only on the weekends" The man thanks the bartender and proceeded to leave the bar. He now knows the arrive earlier the following day.

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why did dinosaurs die??? because a giant rock blew them up

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2 peanuts were walking down the street, one was a salted .. the other was raped

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How many Coldplay members can you fit in a car? All of them, the standard car has four seats or more. Coldplay has 4 members so it makes perfect logical sense

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Q.What's worse than running over a dog on the road? A.9/11

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I like my coffee like I like my women Without a penis

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Why did the man walk into a bar? Well hell I don't know I thought you might.

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Why cant stevie wonder see? He is blind

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Roses are burning, Violets are burning, my house is on fire

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What do you do when a blonde throws a hand grenade at you? Run.

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Did you hear about the black guy who got into college? Actually, there are nearly 10,00 African Americans who get accepted into college every year. This specific black male is notable because of his stellar grades and his activity in his community.

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What do you call Justin Beiber having sex with a woman? Gay

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Your mother

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josh roberts you speccy cuunt

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What is a ghost's favorite dessert? Nothing. Ghosts do not exist, thus they cannot eat dessert.

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Ding dong... Knocking hurts.

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What did the anti-joke say? Nothing for it is an anti-joke which is a group of word formed to create a sentence and sentences cannot speak.

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scenario: 12 men in bikinis throwing snowballs at each other in Africa. Question: Who ate all the world's giant pears? Answer: It was an allergy to noses!!

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Why did the chicken attempt to cross the road? To retrieve his dead relatives in the middle of the street.

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Why didn't the depressed girl go on facebook? She was dead

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Knock knock Who's there? Alzhiemers guy Alzhiemers guy who? Knock knock

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A man went to the doctor and told him he was having the strangest dream. "First I was a tee pee Then I was a wigwam A tee pee, a wigwam. Do you have any idea what could be wrong?" The doctor looked at the man and said "You have aids."

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Q: What's funnier than 24? A: 25.

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if japanese cars are called riceburners would german cars be called jewburners

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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