Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho!" Asain Santa Claus, "Hohohohohohohoho!" Pedophile Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho! Come and sit on my lap children!" Dyslexic Santa Claus, "Oh oh oh! Merry Shitcrams!" Narcopleptic Santa Claus, "Ho ho..." *snores*. Black Santa Claus, well, I wouldn't like the idea of a black fat guy breaking into my house, eating my cookies, drinking my milk, and leaving presents under my tree. Would you?

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What's more boring than watch grass grow? Watching grass not grow.

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Roses are red Violets are red Trees are red Shrubs are red HOLY SHIT! MY YARD IS ON FIRE!

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What did the robot do when a person was shot? Nothing, it wasn't programmed for that situation.

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Why do teenagers, especially girls between the ages of 12-17 love Justin Bieber? Answer: Because he promotes himself worldwide and creates a fanbase large enough to promote his career thus increasing profits which provides him a better quality of life and great financial future

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What do you do when a guy pulls up in a van with piercings and a gay lisp, what do you do? Get in the van.

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Incey-wincey Spider climbed up the water spout. Down came the rain and washed the spider out. Out came the sun and dried up all the rain. But sadly, the spider had drowned. [L]

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Whats worse than meeting kim kardashian? everything shes the hottest freakin celeb there is

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What did the teacher tell the failing student? You will most likely be kicked out of our school and have no further education and be subjected to a low-level career.

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Roses are red, violets are red, daffodils are yellow, and pansies are pink.

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Why did Rose throw the clock out the window? Because she's a moron.

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Why couldn't the boy play catch with his dad? His Dad is dead.

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Jacob Edwards has friends.

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what's funnier than 3 dead babies in a trashcan pretty much anything thats not funny

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What sits in a corner and travels all the way around the world? A stoner on hallucinogens.

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Why did the rabbit like to wear shoes? It doesn't.

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Haha pizza

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Why did the black guy cross the road? To save the endangered child from getting hit by a car across the street.

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what is fat and ugly. fat and ugly people

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What did the man say after falling off the bridge? Nothing. He died a painful and terrible death on impact.

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3 men walked into a bar... They sat down and had a beer.

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What did the polar bear say to the penguin? Nothing. They don't live on the same continent.

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Why don't they sell pharmaceuticals in the rain forest? Because it is to sparsely populated and not economically viable.

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A: ask me if I'm a truck. B: why? A: just ask me. B: are you a truck? A: no.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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