What do a grape and a spider have in common? Both have 8 legs..... Except for the grape.

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A blonde walks into an electronics store to buy a toaster, the shopkeeper tells her that they do not serve blondes. She sues for discrimination and receives a considerable cash settlement while the shopkeeper looses his store and reluctantly works at a fast food franchise.

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whats the difference between a battery and a charger

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Q: Why is winter the best season? A: It eliminates the homeless.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Two gay men in a hottub. They relaxed for about half an hour before getting out and going to the bed, where they fell asleep.

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What did the guy do with the tv remote? Turn on the tv

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I told my friend a joke. He didn't laugh, I asked why. He said he was autistic and he does not understand humor.

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If olive oil is made of olives, calculate the mass of the sun.

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Yo momma is so fat that you should really take her to the hospital, i've become very concerned for her.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "what'll it be?" The horse, unable to understand human language. Takes a shit and walks out.

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why did the bird fall out of the tree? Earth's Gravitational pull

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what does chuck norris use to cut scissors? another scissor.

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I am not racist, racism is a crime! Crime is for black people.

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What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing. Fruits can't talk.

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Ask me if I'm a giraffe Are you a giraffe? Yes

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roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

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your mom is so stupid she did not do so well on her IQ test

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austins gay lolololol

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Why is jim gay? because he likes men

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Your mother is so fat that when she passes in front of the tv, I lose 3 seasons of the series

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How did shaniqua fall of the hill? because the diabito truck ran her over

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What's the main reason for divorce? Marriage.

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What is worse than 10 dead babies in a trash can? 1 dead baby in 10 trash cans

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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