We're out of mustard, so in your sandwich I used some yellow liquid dripping from a dying rhinoceros.

What walks like a duck, talks like a duck, but doesn't look like a duck? A horse named Quackie

What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre

Roses are red, Violets are PURPLE.

A Jew, a Muslim and an atheist meet at the same bus station. A religious argument breaks out shortly and the three board their respective buses angry and upset. They were a really bad example of religious tolerance.

What do you call a fly with no wings? A fly.

Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding a bomb in your apple.

What's silver and bad for your teeth? A wrench

what do a snake and a bird have in common? they can both fly! except for the snake.

Steven Hawking walks into a bar. This of course is impossible, as his ailments prevent him from walking.

A Man walks into a car dealership and asks the salesman "How many of these Blue ones do you have in stock" ? The salesman looks at the Man and begins to cry. "Why are you crying" asks the Man "I had a dog named Blue once" replied the salesman. And then he ate a taco in front of the Man,wiped his hands on his slacks and slowly backed away from him. The Man thought to himself..."Gee I'm hungry" and left the car dealership to go buy a taco instead.

Why didn't Jane buy an ice-cream? Because she was lactose intolerant.

Knock Knock, Who's there? Satan. Oh **** go away.

Trust me im a doctor but this is pratice

Why is six afraid of seven? Seven is a convicted rapist.

How many small children does it take to change a light bulb? None. Children are not old enough to do this by themselves.

The Economy

A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were driving on a highway. The redhead asked the brunette, who had the map, which was the next exit. The blonde was better with maps so she took it and announced where to go. They made the exit and enjoyed a nice lunch.

If I was black, I wouldn't be white.

Whats ironic about the Facebook "like" button? Nothing

What do you put on top of salad? Salad Dressing.

your mom is so gay that...wrong, a homosexual women is considered a lesbian.

Why does the jailbird sing? It makes Bubba horny.

Knock, knock. Come in!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...