A man walks into a car dealership. The salesman was nice and he bought a Mercedes.

"luke Bastiaan" "So, whens your period?"

Why didn't the 13 year old boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

What does Santa get for Christmas? A shitload of work to do.

what happens when you mix a black guy and a Mexican? nothing, it is physically impossible to "mix" people.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

why was the asian kid found dead? he failed an examen

Your Momma is so ugly, she got plastic surgery.

Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his head.

Two chemists walk into a bar. The first says, "I'd like some H2O" The second says "I'd like some H2O as well." Nobody dies.

Communism

MICHAEL

I do not like the fact that you are linked with the feds.

Why would you throw a hooker in a lake? To go fishing

What do you put on top of salad? Salad Dressing.

Knock knock, Knock knock jokes aren't funny.

A man walked into a bar, he was extremely short sighted, after this occurence he decided to phone up the opticians to get some glasses.

What do you call a women with two black eyes? Someone trapped in the cycle of violence that is domestic abuse. The few friends and family members she still speaks with tell she should leave. They don't know about the last time she threatened to leave him, when he held a gun to her throat and screamed "You try an leave me I'll kill you and your precious god damn babies!" Now she suffers silently for fear of what he might do to her family, but is increasingly worried about the way her husband has begun looking at their 13 year old daughter. Every night she kneels at the foot of her bed and prays for death, over the sounds of her own sobbing and her husbands drunken rage. Also she is a slow learner.

a dyslexic Satan worshiper sold his soul to Santa

A women gets a call saying her only daughter is trapped inside a burning building. She runs as fast as she can too her car before she realizes... women can't drive due to their role in society.

How did the chicken cross the road? He went to the crosswalk so all the cars had to stop for him.

A llama walks into a pub. Actually, he didnt, because it is physically impossible for a llama to stand up and proceed to walk over 2.8 feet. That stat was a lie.

Why does a chicken lay an egg? If she'd throw it, it would break.

what has a huge nose and is jewish??? Henery Miller!!!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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