what kind of person screaws in a light blub........ a electrician

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Women's rights

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Roses are red violets are red, the grass is red Holy crap! My yard is on fire!

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What do you call a Colombian who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

The seven dwarfs were in a sauna feeling happy. So Happy got up and left.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Fuck her

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why aren't jokes funny in base 8? Because 7, 10, 11.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because people kept making the same joke about her not having arms so she was hoping the fall would break her neck.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because once it had inadvertently escaped the farm it was being kept on it was startled and with no concept of road and pavement happened to traverse a road, with no real motive.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

your mom is so old she was put in an old age home

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A horse walks into a glue factory..

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and and no legs in front of a door? A: A quadruple amputee.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

cut it out ..but i dont have a scissor

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did the woman make a sandwich? She was hungry

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Knock Knock Who is it? Me, I forgot my keys on the way out oh ok...

thumb_up thumb_down +20

How did the lifegaurd break his leg? He was hit by a submarine!

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

A bear walks into a bar and says to the barman "I'll have a pint of................ beer please." The barman says "why the big pause?"

thumb_up thumb_down +20

a man walks into a bar..... the man pulls out a gun and robs the place as he is exiting he bumps into a child the child falls in the street and is crushed by a bus. the bus in an attempt to avoid the child swerves and hits a maternity clinic next to a gas station that promptly explodes. the robber so distraught he trys to shoot himself but the gun misfired and the man was arrested and was raped repeatedly in prison...he now has aids...

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What do you call five white guys sitting on a bench? THe NBA

thumb_up thumb_down +18

a man walked into a bar, however the bar was in Pakistan so he got shot by terrorists

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Last week, I saw a film. As I recall it was a horror film.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

how do you stop a speeding car? Put your foot on the brake

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why didn't the man kiss his wife. Because he had no lips.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops