What do you call a black guy flying a plane. A pilot

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What do you call a fat ethiopian. Impossible

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your car? 12:00

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What's green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels

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Roses are red Violets are red Trees are red Shrubs are red HOLY SHIT! MY YARD IS ON FIRE!

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Why did the jelly baby go to school? Because he was brought up in a middle class background and wanted a full education to further his future career

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hi

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What's the worst thing a 13 year old could do? Have their Bar Mitzvah in Nazi Germany.

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Roses Are Red Lemons are sour, open up your legs and give me an hour

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How do you get a movie star to go out with you? Blackmail.

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Your mama so fat, that it's starting to affect her relationship with her husband in a negative or harmful way. (CSC)

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What did the black father say to his daughter? you're adopted

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What do you call a one eyed hippo? A do-you-think-he-potamus

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What's more boring than watch grass grow? Watching grass not grow.

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What do you call a black guy driving a plane? Jamal

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What did David say to Goliath? Not sure, does anyone have a Bible?

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Do you know why your mom is so bold? Becaus she's got cancer

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What did the tourist in Africa get? A souvenior.

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How do you find Nemo? Watch the movie.

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You know what's annoying When you suddenly die of a heart attack

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What's the difference between an old quarter and a new penny? 24 cents

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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How do you fit 100 babies into a bucket? With a blender. How do you get them out again? With Doritos.

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While on a business trip, a Jim got a call on his cell phone. It was his best friend. He was informing Jim of his wife's death in a terrible train crash. She didn't die on impact, but her legs were cut off by metal debris from the train car in front of her. She fought against the pain and used a shirt she found from a dead body to stop the bleeding. She managed to drag herself to the nearest road crossing, where someone drove her to the hospital. Despite her efforts to survive and the surgeons efforts to save her, she died that night as a result of excessive blood loss. After he hung up, Jim turned up the ringer volume on his phone because he couldn't hear it very well when it rang.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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