12 22 giraffe hippo 66 otter zebra cat 99 okay, the end

Question : Why did the boy need to change his pants? Answer: During recess, the little boy was running to fast and fell on the ground. Then kid he has been bullying pissed on his leg.

I learned a new party trick over the weekend; I swallow a piece of string and it comes out my other end tied! I shit you knot.

"Knock, Knock" "Go away, I have a lot of stuff to do right now and knock knock jokes suck."

Whats red and hairy ? A carpet !

what do you call a fish without eyes? a fshhhhh

Your momma is so fat that when she steps on the scale it says 300 lbs.

The doctor said he had good news and bad news. I asked for the bad news first. He said, "You have AIDS. I asked what the good news was. He said "You will only have it about a year."

Life is like a box of chocolates. You eat them. get fat. Die.

Why do gorillas have big nostrils? Have you seen the size of their fingers!?!?!

in the begining... god made some stuff

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To mourn the loss of his daughter who died due a fatal car crash, caused by him while he was driving. across the street

Why can't an elephant smoke cigarettes? They do not posses the fine motor skills.

Roses are brown, violets are brown, who keeps shitting in my garden?

Why did the man take off all his clothes? He was going to take a shower.

What did the priest say to the rabbi? "Hey Joe, how's the family?"

Why did the jelly baby go to school? Because he was brought up in a middle class background and wanted a full education to further his future career

a little girl is playing outside of her house when i man in a van approaches her and stops to ask if the girl will help him find his puppy and that he has some gandy. seeing as the girl has a great love for animals she gets in the van. the man and the little girl drive around until they find the puppy. the man is so overjoyed her rewards the girl with candy. he then drives her back to her house and she feels wonderful having helped the man find his puppy. the end.

Q:Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple A:You have AIDS

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side... But he got hit by a car instead, Life is full of disappointments

What did the polar bear say to the penguin? Nothing. They don't live on the same continent.

Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms ... Knock knock Who's there? Not Susie

What is white, long, and thin? A tablecloth

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...