why did santa fall of the roof? Because the roof was slippery from the ice.

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Why couldn't the 10 year old see the Pirate Movie? Because he was dead...

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How are eagles and jellyfish the same? They both fly but jellyfish don't.

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Of two wrongs don't make a right what do they make? I don't know but three rights make a left

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How do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it. How do you make it stop crying? You throw another brick at it.

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Why did the dog bark? Who knows, dogs bark for many reasons unknown to humans.

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "Sorry sir we're closed" So the man goes: "Oh, okay. I wasn't sure if you guys were open till' 10pm tonight" and the bartender goes "No, thats only on the weekends" The man thanks the bartender and proceeded to leave the bar. He now knows the arrive earlier the following day.

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Anne Frank.

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why do black people hate aspirin? Its white, it works, and you have to pick cotton to get to it.

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Why can't Sally brush her hair? Because she has leukemia.

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Q:What are black people so good at basketball? A: Because they are black!

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Babies are like landmines; when you step on them they explode.

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Pickles

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Roses are red violets are red, the grass is red Holy crap! My yard is on fire!

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The seven dwarfs were in a sauna feeling happy. So Happy got up and left.

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ROSS G IS OBESE

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How do you make a baby eat his food? Make one first

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A horse walks into a glue factory..

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Q: how do you tame a dingo? A: Feed it babies

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What do you call a group of black gentle men running down a hill A group of black gentle men running down a hill

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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Little Timmy walked up to the teacher and asked her "Can i go to the restroom?" The teacher said " I don't know, CAN you ?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

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nock nock who's there i eat mop i eat mop ho i didn't know you eat your poo. the wedding is off and go **** yourself in a hole!!

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What happened to the kid who slept on a roof? He died

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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