Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side... But he got hit by a car instead, Life is full of disappointments

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What happened to the guy who ate an alarm clock at six o' clock in the morning? He puked a lot, and was diagnosed with a horrible digestive disorder.

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How do you get a movie star to go out with you? Blackmail.

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Shit happens. Correction: feces happens.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms ... Knock knock Who's there? Not Susie

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Guy 1: there is this really funny knock knock joke. Ok you start. Guy 2: knock knock Guy 1: who's there Guy 2: umm what? I don't know

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You're momma's so fat, that I just wanna go over there and make hot passionate love to her. What? I'm a chubby chaser.

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What's worse than a dead baby in a trash can? The grief the family feels at the loss of their newborn child.

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I don't often drink beer. But when I do, I recklessly beat my wife and kids.

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What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo.

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how did the horse fall into the river? he sliped

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Penis.

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I'm not as random as you think i salad.

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What do people do in France when they are hungry? Get something to eat.

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69

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What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAA

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What do you get when you cross a cat with a log? I think the better question is why are you mixing those two things together?

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Is this the Krusty Krab? No, the Krusty Krab is a fictional place, and therefore does not exist.

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A man walks into a bar. He asks the bartender for a glass of milk. The bartender says, "Sorry we don't serve milk here.

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What's funny about suicide? Nothing, that's horrible.

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Whatsthe best way to kill a blonde? Tell her theres a scratch and sniff at the bottom of the pool.

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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Why don`t women need watches? Because in our modern society, there are many clocks in most locations.

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Why did the white guy feel awkward at the black people convention? He didn't know anyone there

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops