onranges are orange bananas are yellow and apples are red/green ................... and im ................. PINK (lw/kc)

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? He didn't have the necessary mental ability or muscle structure to complete said task.

a dragon walks into a bar. the bartender says "stop it". the dragon eats the bartender.

Robocop and T-800 where fighting, first the T-800 manages to injure Robocop critically, but Robocop manages to repair himself and break T-800`s legs off, which T-800 suddenly regrows due to an unexpected upgrade. After several hours of combat, where civilians are injured and half the town is destroyed they where both worn out, but ready for one last struggle... ...Eventually there was a great celebration for whoever won.

Yo mama is so fat, she had to get liposuction.

Q; Why was the man loosing his hair? A; Because since he was at an older age, he was going bald.

What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

Q:what has legs but may never walk? A: a table

What's the difference between a duck and a goose? They are obviously different species but they both have wings and are birds and are actually pretty similar. Geese are usually bigger though I guess.

Wanna hear a joke? Women's rights.

I don't always drink beer, but when I do, I drink water!

What's big, red and eats rocks? A big, red Rock-Eater

Why didn't the man kiss his wife. Because he had no lips.

How do you keep an extraordinary magician from performing his show? Replace his shampoo with battery acid

Why did the woman make a sandwich? She was hungry

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Someone else's cheese.

Today i told myself i would write a joke... Joke... ????????????LAUGH!????????????

Knock knock! Who's there? Dick! Dick who? Dick Stewart, your neighbor from next door!

CHIIIICKKIIIIIIIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What did the young boy get for Christmas? All his brothers belongings because his brother died

Hey

What did the dead man say at his own funeral? Nothing, he's dead...

solve y = [1 arctan (x)] / [2-3 arctan (x)]

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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