1, 2, buckle my shoe. 3, 4, shut the door. 5, 6, I'm gonna to cut you in your sleep.

Your argument is invalid, but I will allow you your opinion nonetheless.

Knock Knock Who's there? Gestapo.

what is funnier then a man with AIDS? -nearly anything as AIDS is a serious medical condition and could be potentially lethal

What did the racist slave owner do when his slave refused to complete his task? Asked him nicely until the task was completed.

How many dead babies does it take to paint a house red. Babies, especially dead ones cannot paint.

What's the difference between a Mexican and a park bench? The Mexican is alive and the park bench isn't.

What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to a chicken

What happened to the latino and asian man in math class when they had a test? They both recieved exceptional scores as they both helped each other study the night before.

If John has 32 candy bars and he eats 28, whAt does he have? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

-Knock Knock. -Come in.

Friend: I said pass the juice, not gas the jews! Hitler: Oh.

Knock Knock Whos there Reality* Knock Knock *Opens Door*

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

you know what they say about people with big feet, they have big feet...

your mom is so old she was put in an old age home

A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "Sorry sir we're closed" So the man goes: "Oh, okay. I wasn't sure if you guys were open till' 10pm tonight" and the bartender goes "No, thats only on the weekends" The man thanks the bartender and proceeded to leave the bar. He now knows the arrive earlier the following day.

Q:whats yellow and flys through walls A:A magical Banana

why do cats hate dogs? because cats were bullied by dogs in highschool.

do you know what's so funny? yup

Hi, my name is Mark and I have dead babies in my garage... Just kidding. My name is not Mark.

Whats worse than being gay? Nothing.

What's blue and smells like pee? Pee, I lied about the color

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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