The doctor said he had good news and bad news. I asked for the bad news first. He said, "You have AIDS. I asked what the good news was. He said "You will only have it about a year."

I love Ciara!

why cant sophie lifeguard safely because she cant swim that good

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Why did Helen Kellers dog run away? You would too if your name was Hjshdvcyehbretafvvba.

Knock knock Whose there? you you who you know who you are

Knock knock. Who's there? Becca. I just found out i have aids, so you should probably get yourself checked out.

Q: Why did the monkey climb a tree? A: To avoid predators.

What do you call a black guy with a fan? An African American male Homo Sapien who is most likely hot and sweaty and is probably trying to create cold air and then reduce how hot they are likely reducing the sweat glands natural instict to create ameliorate of sweat and then make him feel better.

what's red and fluffy ... red fluff

What is a bear's favorite televison show? It doesnt have one because it is a bear which makes watching television an illogical fallacy.

What do you call a blond harvesting penuts a penut farmer.

The Holocaust

There once was a man from Bangkok, who hated limericks.

potatoes

Women

A man walks into the corner of a table and bruises his leg. The bruise continues to be there for about 3 weeks.

What's more boring than watch grass grow? Watching grass not grow.

Q: what's red and goes up and down? A: a tomato in an elevator

What is worse than being ran over by a bus? Nothing really.

Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the bird

What did the boy do when he was cold? Got a blanket.

whats the differnce between a baby and a dart board? dart boards dont bleed.

why didn't the printer work? it was in the toilet.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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