What's hard and straight going in, and soft and sticky coming out? chewing gum

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Why do witches ride on brooms? Because they have magical powers!

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What do you call a gay dinosaur? a mega sore ass

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A duck walks into a bar, the bartender asks "What'd you want?" the duck responds "A miller lite please" promptly after that the bartender was tested for mental insanity because he thinks ducks can talk.

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An Oldish (probably 27) man walks into a chuck-e cheese, He then puts on his coustume.

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What did the Black guy say to the White Rapper? I really like your music.

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TRUE COMEDY: "HOW ABOUT THAT AIRLINE FOOD!"

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In Capitalist America, bank robs you!

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You best friend has a bladder disease. You ask him how he got it. He says " I was watching the superbowl and had to go, but I didn't want to miss the commercials. So it was either watching the game and getting a bladder disease that would end up killing me or going to the bathroom . Now you know where i went wrong."

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what do you call a shoe with legs? roadrunners.

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What did the penguin say to the polar bear? Your in the wrong hemisphere

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What was the biggest party of 2010? The Democrats.

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what do we want a cure for turrets! when do we want it C U NT !!!

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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LOOP IN ARE FOR TOYUIL!!!!! HAR HAR HAR!!!!!!!! MOY SAY UHJIN LAK WAQUI SAMPA!!!!!!! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LOLOLOLOL IT IS SO FUNNY TO JOKE ABOUT!

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What do your friends and a tree have in common? They both die if you set them on fire.

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Roses are red Violets are blue If I see another Joke like this (besides mine) I'll kill you

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tw10xa_xtNg

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your mom is so fat she died of brain cancer

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What's the difference between a ferrari and a sack of babies? I don't have a ferrari in my garage.

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whats worse then biting into a worm and finding an apple??? getting raped up the butt by a giant tiger!

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I feel like am motherf***ing stuck in this dock and it makes me wana quack like what the hell is THAT!

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Why are there no Mexican people on Star Trek? Because the casting director screened thousands of actors and actresses and assembled what he/she felt was the most talented cast to create and sustain a long running television series. Unfortunately no one of Mexican dissent was awarded a role.

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Roses are red Violets are blue This difference is due largely to the alteration of the white light wavelenght as it excites the electrons in both flowers and the absorption of most of the other colours of the spectrum.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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