What do Jews, Jehovah's Witnesses, Slavs, Gays, and Retards have in common? The Holocaust.

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Why did little Susie light herself on fire? Answer: She wanted to be warm

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Why can't Ray Charles drive? Because he's blind? No, because he's dead

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What's the similarity between a dog and a car? They're both made out of atoms.

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Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms.

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What would Martin Luther King Jr. be today if he was white? Alive.

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Why do Squirrels accidentally plant millions of trees. Because they they bury their nuts and forget where they are.

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why did the first monkey fall out the tree? he was dead why did the second monkey fall out the tree? he was hit by the first one why did the third monkey fall out the tree? peer pressure why did the fourth monkey fall out the tree? he thought it was a game

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Why is my car broken? Because I drove it into a wall.

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what did you call a downer in the medieval times? spazalot

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like facebook.com/john maon

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What do you call a black man digging a hole in the ground with a body covered in blood, bruises and stab marks next to him? An gardener, he uses a different type of fertiliser.

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Your mom is so fat she has to buy clothes at a Plus-size clothing store.

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Why did little Johnny eat his homework? Because his family is very poor and he rarely eats.

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Boy: Doctor! Doctor! I can't see my arm! Doctor: It's because your blind son

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Did you hear about that one time (@ band camp lol) where there was a little boy and he wanted to go swimming sooooo abd and then ooo look squirrel

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How did the blonde screw in a lightbulb? She didn't, she fell and broke her neck and went to a hospital. Thus you should not laugh.

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Sarah Palin is President

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How did Little Jimmie leave school? In a body bag.

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Whats worse then your penis in your mouth? Your mom in your penis.

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's the mailman delivering your weekly delivery

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Why did the child with terminal cancer and leprosy get sent to the principal's office? Because his parents and brother died in a car accident, and the principal though he should be informed.

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GLaDOS: So... this cat loves lasagna so much that he eats all of the lasagna in his house. Okay, apparently it's not the cat's house or his lasagna. Oh good! The man who owns the lasagna is furious! GLaDOS: The end. GLaDOS: The end? GLaDOS: That's not funny. GLaDOS: Do either of you feel like laughing? GLaDOS: Alright, I'm pulling you out. GLaDOS: Welcome back. While you were dead, I reworked the cartoon. It's up on the screen. GLaDOS: As you can see, in my version the man points out to the cat that the house is equipped with deadly neurotoxin dispensers. GLaDOS: At which point the cat reflects on the time he ate all of the man's lasagna and feels remorse. GLaDOS: Briefly. GLaDOS: Reactions? GLaDOS: Yes, it's funny because most of it actually happened.

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how do you fit 100 jews in a car? 2 in the front seat, 3 in the back seat, and 95 in the ash tray.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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