Your momma is so fat that when she steps on the scale it says 300 lbs.

The doctor said he had good news and bad news. I asked for the bad news first. He said, "You have AIDS. I asked what the good news was. He said "You will only have it about a year."

Fat people are harder to kidnap!!

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Why can't an elephant smoke cigarettes? They do not posses the fine motor skills.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To mourn the loss of his daughter who died due a fatal car crash, caused by him while he was driving. across the street

Roses are brown, violets are brown, who keeps shitting in my garden?

Why did the jelly baby go to school? Because he was brought up in a middle class background and wanted a full education to further his future career

What did the priest say to the rabbi? "Hey Joe, how's the family?"

Why did the man take off all his clothes? He was going to take a shower.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side... But he got hit by a car instead, Life is full of disappointments

How do you know a dude is dead? He doesn't breath, he has no color in the face and his heart has stoped.

a little girl is playing outside of her house when i man in a van approaches her and stops to ask if the girl will help him find his puppy and that he has some gandy. seeing as the girl has a great love for animals she gets in the van. the man and the little girl drive around until they find the puppy. the man is so overjoyed her rewards the girl with candy. he then drives her back to her house and she feels wonderful having helped the man find his puppy. the end.

What did the polar bear say to the penguin? Nothing. They don't live on the same continent.

Your mama so fat, that it's starting to affect her relationship with her husband in a negative or harmful way. (CSC)

What is white, long, and thin? A tablecloth

hi

What is the difference between a Ferrari and a dead hooker? One is a car and one is a human being.

How can you tell if a Mexican's gay? Ask politely.

What did the man do at the "take a penny leave a penny holder" He took a penny, and left a penny.

What do you call a black guy driving a plane? Jamal

What did the tourist in Africa get? A souvenior.

Why did the man drink water? Because he was thirsty

HAHA SO ONE TIME... The man could not finish his story because he gets shot, and is mourned for years. His daughter was watching it all. She then jumped. And fell. And broke her knee. And then died. yeah

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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