If I crash my car, how many trees does it take to cover my yard in orange juice, yellow, because a cat pissed on my foot.

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Women's Rights

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why do girls like 77? ................ ...................... ................. ...................... ................ becuz they get 8 more :P

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snooki from jersey shore walks into a bar and gets arrested.

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Knock knock. Hello dear. Come in.

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Knock, Knock Who's There. You. You who. You are you. WTF!

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roses are red violets are blue i hate black people

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What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

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What happened when Dave tried to break the record for most marshmallows in the mouth at once? He choked and died.

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roses are black, violets are black, im sleeping

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I'm gay.

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antijokes

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why did the parakeet eat the cracker? because it wanted to.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poker face pa pa poker face!!!

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A shark walks into a bar and the bartender says Why the bloody face? The shark replies by saying my wife beat me with a stick. Considering that sharks cant talk, the bartender ends up going to the doctor to see if he may be dillousinal.

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What`s that CREAM that comes out of you when your mom puts a WHIP on you with a switch? WHIPCREAM!

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Q:Why did the chicken cross the road A:Why does everyone want to know it's just a chicken

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the middle of the ocean? SOL.

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only one person get beat up chuck norris. Who you say? Bruce Lee. He got lucky because his eyes were closed.

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Milk, milk, lemonade, around the corner fudge is made. This market has a very dynamic and fresh selection.

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What do you cal a black boy with a bike? A thief

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What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

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a horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face?" and the horse says "my wife has terminal cancer.

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What's Worse then an apple with a worm? The holocaust

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops