What did the Engineer say to the English major? Hey we went to the same school and got different degrees! Cool!

If John has 32 candy bars and he eats 28, whAt does he have? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

Do you know karate, shorty? Or are those bruises from an abusive father?

Why did the little boy die? Because he had cancer.

There is a secret society known as Grandma Elbow. What happened to the boy who tried to leave it? All of his limbs were ripped off and fed to a man eating shark by the name of Nigel Tommy Baker. It didn't hurt that much because the boy was forced into eating the waste products of a donkey before this happened. NEVER LEAVE GRANDMA ELBOw!

Stevie wonder walks across the road without looking both ways.

What's the fastest animal on earth? An Ethiopian chicken.

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house. No. Neither has he

Why do cows have tails? Because my pet rock stopped breathing.

What's funny about being adopted? Your parents never loved you

i said why are you disliking me he said its anti joke

Why do you bury an Asian on the side of a hill? Because he's dead.

A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut

A small child and a pedophile are walking hand-in-hand through the dark, creaky woods. "Mister," says the small child, " I'm scared." "YOU'RE scared?" says the pedophile. "I'M the one who's gonna have to walk back alone!"

what do you get when you cross a daniel lesiak with nothing? Answer - A gay homosexual

What does a girl get from a dead MAN:)?? Nothing he is dead.

Your mother

What is a ghost's favorite dessert? Nothing. Ghosts do not exist, thus they cannot eat dessert.

What do you call five dogs with no balls? Five bitches.

Q: Why do so many of these anti jokes contain refrigerators? A: Seriously I don't know why

Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

What do you get when you combine High Fructose corn syrup. sunflower oil, carbohydrates, and water. How the heck should I know!

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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