What is the best way to put out a fire? Stop, drop and have an orgy.

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What do you call a black man driving a car? A driver.

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Q: What did the anorexic girl do for thanksgiving? A: Nothing, she was paralyzed from a fall 2 days prior and nobody had found her yet.

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If you're a man, why don't you want to drop the soap in prison? The shower floors are disgusting and carry bacteria. No way would any person -- man or woman -- want to touch it.

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Someone told me about this website.

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What did the man tell his parents after having sex with another man? A. I am gay.

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How do you catch a squirrel? Use a live, humane trap, and release it back into the wild afterwards.

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I cut my pubes, Now they itch a lot.

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What's even faster than the speed of light? The speed you close out of porn when you hear someone coming into the room.

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What's the difference between and onion and a dead baby? There is a big difference.

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Why did the boy cross the road? Because he was on his way to a friends house, after being kicked out yet again because his parents are homophobes and can't come to terms with his sexual preferences. When he got there, his friend was already asleep and he had to sleep in the gutter. He then got a cold and died because his immune system had been weakened by aids. His parents still didn't accept him, and didn't go to his funeral.

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Why did the little kid use pillows at night? Because he was constipated.

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Whats pink and fluffy? Pink Fluff

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Why didn't the man kiss his wife. Because he had no lips.

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What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

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That's a lie, buffaloes are extinct now

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"knock knock" "who's there" nobody answered cus it was a bunch of little shits playing knock a door run

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What do you call a fly with no wings? A fly.

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Why does a ginger have no friends? Because it is a non sentient horizontal stem and thus incapable of forming complex social and emotional bonds with conscious organisms.

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What do you get when you mix a fox and a sloth? a..FOTH

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What's the difference between black people and dog shit? One of them eventually turns white and stops smelling.

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why was the girl in the corner with a knife? she's an emo

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My Girlfriend

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obama is a good president

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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