Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

stuff and dogs {()}

How did the chicken cross the road? He went to the crosswalk so all the cars had to stop for him.

"knock knock" "who's there" nobody answered cus it was a bunch of little shits playing knock a door run

You want to know what is worse than having a teen parent? Being a teen parent.

Steven Hawking walks into a bar. This of course is impossible, as his ailments prevent him from walking.

You can lead a horse to water, but you can't put it in a basket.

A scottish and a mexican were walking on the streets when the mexican got hit by a car. The scottish man called the ambulance and walkked away.

Trust me im a doctor but this is pratice

What's white and comes out of a long black stick? Milk with a long black straw.

What is one of the symtoms of clinical depression? Sadness.

what do a snake and a bird have in common? they can both fly! except for the snake.

What is red and not there? No tomatoes.

http://www.ladsta.com

i said "what what in the butt, i said what what in the butt?"

What do you get when you cross a lion with a rhinoceros? A trip to the hospital and animal cruelty charges.

Where did John go after the explosion? Everywhere.

Q: What's a pirate's favorite letter of the alphabet? A: "E"

Pavel Novak

A Black a Jew and a Pollack walk in to the bar bartender says "how may i help you gentlemen"

What's better than a gold medal in the special olympics? ICE CREAM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So a man dipped his balls in sloppy joe sauce.

A simple country boy and a hugely attractive young blonde sit in the same train carriage. They exchange greetings and pleasentaries, but are quiet for the remainder of the journey.

What is worse than peeling a orange that is chasing a dog with raining men? Meeting johnny appleseed

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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