What do a baker and gynecologist have in common? They can smell it, but they can't eat it.

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A: Ask me if im a fire hydrant. B: Are you a fire hydrant? A: No...

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Why can't Hank swim? Hank is a rock

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Knock Knock. Whose there? Not your dead mom.

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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whats the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? the wheelchair

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roses are red, violets are not, this poem makes no sense. Bananas

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Why aren't Anti Jokes funny? Cuz they're against my religion.

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What's the difference between a white person and a chair? -The chair isn't a complete douche.

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What would you do if you're eyes just suddently exploded? You would never see again.

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What is the best way to put out a fire? Stop, drop and have an orgy.

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women leaving the kitchen

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Q: Ask me if I'm a tree. A: No, I am not a tree.

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What is Chuck Norris's favorite musical theme? Tanana na na naa naa na, ta ta ta tanana na naa na ta na na.

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Why does Michael J. Fox make a great milkshake? Because he's had a successful career where he has made a substantial amount of money, allowing him to purchase high quality ingredients.

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What do you call a dead blonde in a closet? A rape victim.

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How are you supposed to breath with no air? um jorden sparks you dont?

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are you lazy? -yes -Why are u lazy? -cause am lazy

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Why does 4 +5 = Hitler? It doesnt it equals 9.

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What's worse than throwing 8 babies off a cliff? Throwing 1 baby off a cliff.

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How many no-armed amputees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

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What's worse than the titanic sinking 9-11

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Why was the little girl lying on the floor. Because she got shot.

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what did the man with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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