Q: what would george washington be doing if he were alive right now? A: screaming in his grave

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"luke Bastiaan" "So, whens your period?"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling

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Q.What is the bigest lie in the universe? A. I have read and agree the the Terms of Service.

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Why did Doris fall down the stairs? Because she was a stupid, uncoordinated old hag with no control over her bladder.

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Your mom is so fat that she sat on a rock.

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A man and a chicken walk into a bar... I forgot the rest of the joke .... YOUR MUMS A WHORE

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What did the boy with cancer get for christmas? -A haircut

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Do you want to hear a joke? Well, I do too.

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Why can't Amy Winehouse drive? She is dead.

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Why did the baby cross the street. Because he was attached to the chicken.

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Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar.... Homo-sexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual panda just have piece? Man 1: Were the hell did you come from? Homo-sexual Panda: My mother's uterus same as you, retard.

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why cant blondes water ski.......... because whenever they split their legs they feel somthing wet

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When life gives you lemons,you say thank you.

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Q. Why did the monster have eight legs? A. I don't know.

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What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

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What was the pirate's favorite letter? Q.

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why wouldn't the printer print? because it had no ink.

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We're out of mustard, so in your sandwich I used some yellow liquid dripping from a dying rhinoceros.

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why is the grass green? all the other colors in the electromagnetic spectrurm are absorbed except for green which is reflected and thats the only visable color

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An Englishman, Irishman and Scotsman walk into a bar. It happens frequently at UK airports.

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What do you call a black man selling drugs? A pharmacist

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Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding a bomb in your apple.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by a wolf that eventually killed and ate it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops