Q: What's the similarity between puzzles and women? A: Prior to the 1920's neither had the right to vote.

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Q: Why is the sun so bright? A: Because it reads books!

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What's white and sticky? Glue

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whats worse then finding a finger in your soup? - being a cook and losing a finger

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Why can't a T-Rex clap his hands? Because its dead

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why couldn't the blonde change the light bulb? because he chose the wrong sized screwdriver from his tool box

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Q: What word contains all the letters in the alphabet? A: A made-up word, probably.

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me:I will trade you 5 dollars for 10 dollars blond: Okay! me: ...

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Q: What Did Batman Say To Robin When They Got In The Car? A: Get In The Car

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Knock knock. Who's there? President. President who? The President of the United States.

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Abstract thinking part one of... One: What kind of idiot tries to run trough a wall, rather than to just use the door? The "Idiot" is in a cell whose walls are made of thin wood plates, the door is made of steel and locked. How I cured my own damn anxiety five hundred of one: Now this is real see? I got stressed, damn it was like something that was not me but my body scared as shit began fearing for its life right my arms shaking like fuck sweat and all that crapa? So I got pissed got in front of the mirror, stared at myself and shouted "GODDAMN BODY YOU THINKS YOU CAN CONTROL ME? IF YOU DO NOT STOP BEING SO FUCKING AFRAID OF DEATH! THEN I WILL KILL YOU MYSELF!" So yeah unconventional indeed, but it worked for five times, and I never had to use it anymore. Moral: My own body and every fucking cell of it, is not the only one that fears me more than death.

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What's the difference between black people and dog shit? One of them eventually turns white and stops smelling.

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Wife: Do you know what the most untruthful lie I've told you? Husband: What? Wife: That I love you. By the way I'm leaving you for your father. The twins are gay and in love with each other and your daughter is a hooker with AIDS. Your mother killed herself upon hearing all this news. She suffered a lot. Oh, the dog died by rat poisoning that your dad put in the backyard. Bye.

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Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

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Gifted Education classes learning social studies curriculum.

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Rebecca Black

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Q: Who won the fight of two black guys and a white guy? A: The black and white guy because two is better than one.

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How do you kill a blonde? lightsabre to the throat should do it

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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A man. That is all.

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Whats worse than getting in a 30 MPH car accident? Getting in a 40 MPH car accident.

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Do you wanna build a snowman? Person: do you wanna live * or nah

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what happens when you mix a black guy and a Mexican? nothing, it is physically impossible to "mix" people.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his pig? Wheres my Pig?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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