why did the rooster cross the road? because it was stapled to the chicken

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How many no-armed amputees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

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There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs after he got into a fight with his cat? You call him by his name and apologize for leaving catnip on his head.

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What is the answer to the universe? I would tell you but you would get board.

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What do you call a kid with a peg leg and an eye patch? Names

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How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? Fish

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What do you get when Chuck Norris meets Chuck Norris? A bad joke.

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You wanna know something that's totally out of this world? The moon

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You are the weakest link. Goodbye.

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So one day a man walks into a bar. The bartender asks him what he would like to drink. He said he would like a glass of water. The bartender said "why come all the way to a bar just to get some water." The man responded "well its a longer walk to the coffee shop."

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What did the carrot say when he was Chopped. Auch.

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Why couldn't the boy ride his bike? He had no legs. Why didn't he have any legs? He was hit by a truck.

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Q:what has legs but may never walk? A: a table

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 6 was racist.

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Wanna hear a joke? Women's rights.

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onranges are orange bananas are yellow and apples are red/green ................... and im ................. PINK (lw/kc)

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? You set her on fire.

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When life gives you lemons,you say thank you.

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How do you get a bear out of a tree with cheese? Camembert.

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Why did the cow die? Because we need meat

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Let's make like your mother and walk out on your family during pre-adolescence.

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Wife: Do you know what the most untruthful lie I've told you? Husband: What? Wife: That I love you. By the way I'm leaving you for your father. The twins are gay and in love with each other and your daughter is a hooker with AIDS. Your mother killed herself upon hearing all this news. She suffered a lot. Oh, the dog died by rat poisoning that your dad put in the backyard. Bye.

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Osama Bin Laden dies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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