why did the man cross the road? Because he needed to cross the road to reach his destination that was across the road

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You want to hear a joke? Democract

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A man walks into a bar. Jeremy Lin congratulates him for being a person.

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What do you get when you cross a chicken with a beagle? An abomination.

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Why doesn't stevie wonder play snooker? Because it's not very popular in the US.

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Whats worse then your penis in your mouth? Your mom in your penis.

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Why did the man steal 2 watermelons? He was a shoplifter and had a background of crime

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The doctor said he had good news and bad news. I asked for the bad news first. He said, "You have AIDS. I asked what the good news was. He said "You will only have it about a year."

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A horse walks into a bar. Bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by it surroundings, and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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GLaDOS: So... this cat loves lasagna so much that he eats all of the lasagna in his house. Okay, apparently it's not the cat's house or his lasagna. Oh good! The man who owns the lasagna is furious! GLaDOS: The end. GLaDOS: The end? GLaDOS: That's not funny. GLaDOS: Do either of you feel like laughing? GLaDOS: Alright, I'm pulling you out. GLaDOS: Welcome back. While you were dead, I reworked the cartoon. It's up on the screen. GLaDOS: As you can see, in my version the man points out to the cat that the house is equipped with deadly neurotoxin dispensers. GLaDOS: At which point the cat reflects on the time he ate all of the man's lasagna and feels remorse. GLaDOS: Briefly. GLaDOS: Reactions? GLaDOS: Yes, it's funny because most of it actually happened.

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how do you fit 100 jews in a car? 2 in the front seat, 3 in the back seat, and 95 in the ash tray.

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what's your favorite soccer team? liverpool

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knock knock, who's there? you goodbye

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Whats worse than getting negative 5 on your calculus test? Coming up positive on your Chlamydia test.

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What did the priest say to the rabbi? "Hey Joe, how's the family?"

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust.

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How does a black man make an anti joke? www.anti-joke.com/submit

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Bin Laden is dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side... But he got hit by a car instead, Life is full of disappointments

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knock knock 'who's there?' 'just open the door'

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What's the difference between a Jew and Hitler? Well, I asked you so I don't know why you said "what?".

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What's brown and sticky? -A stick.

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boobs

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What's a Mexican's favorite sport? It varies from person to person.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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