why don't you make like a tree. and get out of here

ron:jim i cant get the toaster to work jim:dude thats a thats my car!

I ENJOY MASTURBATING

Howmuch wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Anyone? I'm trying to settle a bet.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the chicken fall off the tree? It was stapled to the monkey.

What's the difference between a vegetable and my son? Nothing

What did Lady Gaga say to Justin Timberlake? "I love the Backstreet Boys!" Justin Timberlake Replied with a Bazooka.

What's the difference between unicorns and black people? Years of slavery.

Two gay men enjoy a wonderful second date together.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple, finding a apple in your worm.

What is the best way to put out a fire? Stop, drop and have an orgy.

yo mamas so fat, she started working out

Why was the man so unhappy. he died

Why did the little kid use pillows at night? Because he was constipated.

When I was at the beach digging in the sand I looked down and someone said nehow

A guy walks into a bar. The bartneder says, "Wow, buddy, you look awful. What's wrong?" The guy responds, "My life is a joke."

everyone's always talking about the emperor's clothes, don't they know this is murica

what did the man with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? cancer.

A feminist walked into a bar and had her period

Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

Knock, knock. Who's there? New Kids on the Block. Wait, who?

How can you confuse a blonde? Give her a calculus worksheet that she hasn't learned how to do.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I don't have cancer, but you do. Love, your doctor.

Hitler was Jewish.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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