whats the differnce between a baby and a dart board? dart boards dont bleed.

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What's the difference between peanut butter and jam? Peanut butter is a food paste made primarily from dry roasted peanuts, while jam is a product made with whole fruit, that is cut into pieces or crushed.

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ROSS G IS OBESE

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And then the devil said "Let there be Justin beiber"

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What's long, hard, and full of semen? a penis.

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A woman goes into a butchers with her baby. She says "I live a few doors down and my scales are broken, do you mind weighing my son?" The butcher takes the boy away and a short while later returns holding a dripping bag. "He's 17lbs two ounces" he informs her, as his colleague brings the boy to the counter safe and well.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Baseball

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why did the chicken cross the road Why not

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a man walked into a bar, however the bar was in Pakistan so he got shot by terrorists

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What do you call all of the skin around the vagina? a women

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm not a very good poet

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yo mama so fat, she wheres glasses to see better!

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Roses are burning, Violets are burning, my house is on fire

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2 peanuts were walking down the street, one was a salted .. the other was raped

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What's red and smells like cherries? Cherries

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why couldn't the blonde change the light bulb? because he chose the wrong sized screwdriver from his tool box

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Why can't Sally brush her hair? Because she has leukemia.

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Why do cows have tails? Because my pet rock stopped breathing.

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What's funny about being adopted? Your parents never loved you

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What did the dead baby say to his mother? Nothing. He's dead.

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I said I read te terms of service. I didnt

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Q: I am an over-protective father looking for my son who was kidnapped and am suddenly traveling with a mentally retarded woman who cant remember her name. By the way my wife was murdered and my son has physical disorder. Then, im hooked up with a hippy who doesnt care about anything. Who am I? A: Marlin the clownfish (from Finding Nemo).

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What does a girl get from a dead MAN:)?? Nothing he is dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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