Why did the man steal 2 watermelons? He was a shoplifter and had a background of crime

thumb_up thumb_down +45

How do black people gain access to houses? Through the front door.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Why did Jill fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why didn't Jill get up? She had no legs. Why didn't anyone help Jill up? She had no friends.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he wanted to.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimers Who are you?

thumb_up thumb_down +25

How do you starve a black person? Hide his food stamps in his work boots

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why do cows have tails? Because my pet rock stopped breathing.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A woman gets in her car to drive.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Never said that friend, anyway I got to put this down, people are asking why I am typing anti jokes. Well, they should all know how much I love spamming by now. ;). Now, you better do not have someone hack this site, it will be a hell of a lot easier explaining this, if this information is not recovered much later, days after getting hacked away. Give it three months, half a year or so, and I will contact you if you like. Have a nice day.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Q:What are black people so good at basketball? A: Because they are black!

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Konock Konock Uh, you spelt knock knock wrong... Oh.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why cant stevie wonder see? He is blind

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Is this the Krusty Krab? No, the Krusty Krab is a fictional place, and therefore does not exist.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the little boy die? Because he had cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Wy did Bryan eet his Dumbelllle? Anderson fell asleep again

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What is as ugly as Justin Bieber's face? Justin Bieber's face.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

knock knock your gay

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What has two wheels, two arms, and a head? A man in a wheelchair. Why was he in a wheelchair? He stepped on a landmine. A man walks, I'm sorry rolled, into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

This is my rifle, this is my gun, one is for shooting, the other is decorative.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Q: Whats more fun that nailing babys to a fence? A: Ripping them off.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Knock Knock! Who's there? Pen. Pen who? Pen is blue. The pen is blue. THE GOD DAMN PEN IS BLUE!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What does a girl get from a dead MAN:)?? Nothing he is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops