what is black and looks like a mushroom? a black mushroom

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Knock knock knock knock knock knock knock knock knock, Who's there? Woodpecker. Woodpecker who? Woodpecker.

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Q:Why did the chicken cross the road A:Why does everyone want to know it's just a chicken

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why did the chicken cross the street? it didn't.

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What do you do when you're making out with your girlfriend? Play with another dude's ass.

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A black guy moves in to your neighborhood. The housing values plummet due to the current economic recession.

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Q: What's worse than a bee sting? A: Two bee stings. Q: What's worse than two bee stings? A: Three bee stings. Q: What's worse than three bee stings? A: Rape.

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what do we want a cure for turrets! when do we want it C U NT !!!

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Why did the man buy a rope? Because he needed a noose

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Lindsay Lohan is often caught flashing her vagina...

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Small titties.

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Why couldn't the college student get on the internet? He can't afford a computer.

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A Jew, a Muslim, and a Christian walk into a bar, they then sit down and discuss the various political factors driving a wedge between unity, peace, harmony and understaning between their religions. They resolve that despite the differences in religious belief, essentially they are all the same, and want happy existences with family and friends, and that equality and peace between religions should be a prime focus of religious institutions and governments. They then band together to criticize aetheists, who present a much more probable explanation for why the Universe is the way it is. An eavesdropper then mulls over the idea that the various religions represented behind him are willing to debate philosophical standpoints, so long as their monotheistic beliefs are not contradicted.

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Q: What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs? A: Russell

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BUTTERFARTING

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a drug dealer was caught and sent to jail. he asks the cop if he could give the cop the drugs for bail. the cop does not except the offer because it is against the law.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? punch her in the dick.

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What's more dangerous than bungee jumping without a rope? Getting into a car with Ben Colbert.

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Do you know how I know that you're gay? You told me you are gay.

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What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

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"Hello." "Hi."

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What's the difference between a lamborghini and a sackful of dead babies? one is a car and the other is a grotesque travesty.

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Q. Why did the koala bear go to court? A. Because too many people were referring to it as a bear when it is infact not a bear.

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A hot girl walks by a boy and he stares at her as she walks past. She see's him and asks "What are you looking at?", to which the boy replied "Oh I'm sorry. You happened to look familiar and I thought 'Perhaps I've met this person before. School? No. Work? No. I then concluded I've never seen you before and then you turned around and asked me what I was looking at".

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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