What did the cow say to the other cow? How should i know? Go ask them.

Why did the mushroom go to the party? He was feeling upset because his wife left him and took full custody of his three kids. His friend cheered him up and took him to the party. At the party, he did a line of cocaine and became a drug addict. He died six months later.

Sarah Palin is President

Knock, knock. "Who's there?" "Monica" "Monica who?" "Monica Lebinsky, your neighhbor"

a guy takes viatamins thinking they would help him be healthy he choked and then he died from choking on a jolly rancher

A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His family receives the news and become the talk of the town. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

What do you get when you cross a chicken with a beagle? An abomination.

Why do you put a baby in the blender but first? To see the facial expressions

When Jesus came back from the dead the first thing he said was "It was just a prank bro!"

Where does a leper go every Monday and Wednesday? The dermatologist.

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because he was dead.

Q .What robin told to batman before they got into the car? A. Get into the car!!

Three blondes are walking through the woods when the come upon a set of tracks. The blondes stepped away from the tracks to watch the train as it went by.

haha.

When geese fly, they often fly in a V-formation. Why is one side of the V is always longer than the other? Because there are more birds on that side.

This is'nt a joke but like if it pisses you off when people comment on there own joke pretending to be someone else.

Women's rights.

The burgler walked into the house. Nobody noticed the initial intrusion. The burgler quickly left. The family of which was stolen from woke up the next day and enjoyed a hearty breakfast of grains, oats, and barley without a worry on anyone's mind.

What's invisible and smells like carrots? Carrots! ... well if they were invisible..

Why couldn't Maria play Softball? She was born without legs.

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Why did Helen Kellers dog run away? You would too if your name was Hjshdvcyehbretafvvba.

You're momma's so fat, that I just wanna go over there and make hot passionate love to her. What? I'm a chubby chaser.

I told a woman to make me a turkey sandwich. Of course she complied since I was at Subway.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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