The doctor said he had good news and bad news. I asked for the bad news first. He said, "You have AIDS. I asked what the good news was. He said "You will only have it about a year."

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

What did the one man say to the other? Nothing, they didn't know eachother

Why did Dave not hug his wife? Because she looked horrifying from the Iraq war.

What's worse than your mother dying in a car crash? Your father dying in the same crash.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am a whore, Let's have sex.

A man walks into the corner of a table and bruises his leg. The bruise continues to be there for about 3 weeks.

why didn't the printer work? it was in the toilet.

What's better than Westboro Church? Committing over 9000 sins.

1, 2, buckle my shoe. 3, 4, shut the door. 5, 6, I'm gonna to cut you in your sleep.

Your mom is so fat, when she sat on a lump of coal she didn't realize she sat on a lump of coal.

Why do black people cuss so much? Because f#*% you.

knock knock. who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant

yo mama is so fat, she should seriously consider gastric bypass surgery, morbid obesity is extremely detrimental to one's health

How do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it. How do you make it stop crying? You throw another brick at it.

What did the man say to his son? Hello, son.

How do you get a baby out of a blender? With tortilla chips.

How did the fat man die? Clogged arteries leading to a heart attack.

suck my dick.

What's worse than a School Bus accident? The Holocaust.

what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? where's my tractor?

your life

Yo mommas so stupid, she got raped.

Q: Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? A: Because she is a woman.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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