What do you call three black men in a car? One driver, and two passengers.

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what has two legs and bleeds? half a dog

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How do you get a blonde to drown herself? Isolate her in an aqueous environment

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A sick patient asks a doctor, "will i be able to play my guitar?" The doctor replies, "of course you will be able to". "Good because that is my only form of income", says the patient.

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What's the difference between me and you? Dr. Dre

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A penguin was waddling along one day and saw a seal.. The seal stood up and procceded to talk and jump and even twirled around... The penguin realized this was impossible for a seal to be doing this so he hopped on his unicycle and just rode home because he was going to be late for his piano recital

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The priest is a former alcoholic, and has the strength to turn around and leave.

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What did the Muslim do after his friend told him a funny joke ? Laugh.

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What's meaner than taking a candy from a baby? Tossing the baby of a cliff

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OK, A plane carrying 200 passengers crashes on the border between America and Canada. Which side of the border do you bury the victims? Well, it would depend on where the passengers where from or what they had stipulated in their living will. I suppose some would be cremated which opens up a whole other can of worms entirely.

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What should I name my dog?

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how many fish does it take to turn on a lightbulb None, lightbulbs dont work in the ocean

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What do you call a cat with no legs and an inverted anus? Nothing, you're to horrified to speak.

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Roses are blue, Roses are red. Give me your money, Or I'll cut off your head.

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Why did Rose throw the clock out the window? Because she's a moron.

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How can you tell if a Mexican's gay? Ask politely.

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What did the cat say when it jumped into the cardboard box? Meow

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Jacob Edwards has friends.

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What did batman say to robin befor they got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Dandelions are yellow, and so are sunflowers.

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Nah

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roses are red, violets are blue, I talk to myself, and so do it I.

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A man walks into the corner of a table and bruises his leg. The bruise continues to be there for about 3 weeks.

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Why couldn't the women drive? She was dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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