Q.What is the bigest lie in the universe? A. I have read and agree the the Terms of Service.

Whats the difference between a jew and a boy scout boy scouts come back from camp

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have alzheimers, Cheese Toast!

Why was the elderly, Asian, blond pulled over by the officer? She was, and has been completely blind since birth.

potato farming

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

What's has 4 wheels But ain't a blue car A red car

knock, knock whos there? steve steve who? steve johnson hi steve

Why couldn't the prostitute count to 70? She grew up in a poor family and couldn't pay for a good education.

Ask me if I am a bus. Are you a bus? No.

Write your own

So I'm balls deep in this turkey dinner....... then i proceed to ejaculate into it and ruin my family's Thanksgiving along with their perception of me.

What do you get when you cross an owl with a bungee cord? ...an owl with a bungee cord.

People Eating Tasty Animals

Why does the jailbird sing? It makes Bubba horny.

The chicken crossed the road and died. The end.

i wish i was a tree !

What was the worst part when 3 Mexican men fell off a cliff? They each were active in the community and had jobs.

nine...eleven

Knock Knock, Who's there? Satan. Oh **** go away.

what do you call a cat that talks a talking cat

how did the turtle die? it drowned itself

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Its a chicken, giving it the tendencies to wander if not properly fenced in.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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