Why did the man throw the clock out the window? Because he was angry and frustrated with the people in his life, and the ringing clock was the first thing he noticed in his depressed rage.

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How can you tell if your wife is dead? She no longer has a pulse.

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Superman: Batman, can you drive? Batman: No, but I can drive the batmobile.

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How do you make an antijoke corny. How? Corn.

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Where do cows go on the weekend? The slaughterhouse.

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I heard you let the cat out of the bag. It died.

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what do you get when you cross do you get when you cross a banana and a monkey? one happy monkey

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What do your friends and a tree have in common? They both die if you set them on fire.

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What's flatter than a pancake? The baby I just ran over.

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Your Mama's so fat she need some serious medication treating overweight.

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Peas and Corn. Porn., a deer

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I'm Schizophrenic And so am I.

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What olympic event is Kosovo best known for getting gold? Kosovo is the world's newest country and therefore does not yet have complete international recognition.

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what is black and looks like a mushroom? a black mushroom

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Why was the kid underwater? He hit a rock.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven shot up his school and ate nine kids. Also before he was arrested he told six he was going to blow his brains out. Then he murdered the police and has been on the run ever since.

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-Hey, Larry! How much is one plus one? -Two

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Violets are red Roses are blue I scrrewed that up Now can i screw you?

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What was the worst part when 3 Mexican men fell off a cliff? They each were active in the community and had jobs.

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What is really hard around Kim Kardashian? Diamonds.

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a blond applies to college she gets in because she did well in highschool

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Canida

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A man walks into a bar. Now, that's unheard of !

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poker Face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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