Steven Hawking walks into a bar. This of course is impossible, as his ailments prevent him from walking.

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- How do you keep an idiot in suspense? - How? -......

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens have feeble minds and tend to wander around.

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Why is the world round? The early earth was molten, and a liquid in a vacuum subject only to its own gravitational forces will assume the shape of a sphere. Gases will behave in the same manner. The effects of the sun and other planets, plus the rotational effect have caused the earth to assume a round shape.

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i said "what what in the butt, i said what what in the butt?"

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Making jokes about 9/11 is just plane wrong.

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"Roses are Red" "Violets are Blue" That's what they say, But it isn't true. Violets are violet, Now stop sniffing glue!

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I'm not wearing any underwear. Why? Because I am have built in underwear. ;)

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knock knock whos there a duck a duck who QUACK!

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Yo mamas so fat, that she brought a spoon to the super bowl!

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I have read the Terms of Service.

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Looking for a job in this economy is like trying to find employment during an extreme economic downturn.

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Why don't Mexicans sneak back across the border? Because there are more opportunities and free stuff here. Why would they want to leave, especially at the risk of getting caught for crossing in a sneaky fashion?

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? I don't know. I wasn't there.

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What olympic event is Kosovo best known for getting gold? Kosovo is the world's newest country and therefore does not yet have complete international recognition.

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Why did the fish bite the house? Because he wanted to eat the house

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whats 2+2? 69 LOL

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what do you get if you cross a lion with a pig? nothing as the lion would more than likely end up eating the high in fat pig.

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How does a pig go to the hospital? Through the front door.

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Q: Why did the plane crash into a mountain? A: The pilot was a tomato.

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A man stuck his diick in a blender He had a "penis shake" for breakfast

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How do you stop a plane? Throw flying birds at it.

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baby seal walks into a bar

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What is worse than peeling a orange that is chasing a dog with raining men? Meeting johnny appleseed

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops