How many Jews can you fit in a car? Statistically speaking, in a brief survey done by the United States Traffic Commission, they stated that a standard 4-door sedan had the highest percentile of drivers. So, in regards to the legal system, a person may only fit, in fact, 5 jews in a car.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a car.

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A black guy walks into a bar with a beatiful parrot on his shoulder. "Wow," says the bartender. "That is really something. Where'd you get it?" The parrot was his fathers. Do to severe mental and physical illness, he can no longer take care of it. He asked his son to take it, those were his last words as he slipped into a coma

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why did the old woman die? Because she was too old to live

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Two blonds are racing. Who wins? The first one to pass he finish line.

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Q; Why does paint dry? A; Because plankton are single cell organisms

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Why was the girl crying? She got kicked in the vagina

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You can lead a horse to water, but you can't put it in a basket.

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Windows Vista

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My friend may look like a circle but..... ......He's actually a square.......

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Why don't I ever lmao? Because my ass got bitten off by a bear.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? Dead Babies

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What did the cow call the hen? A hen, what else would you call it?

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "what'll it be?" The horse, unable to understand human language. Takes a shit and walks out.

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potato farming

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What's worse than being swallowed by a blue whale? Being swallowed by a bule whale with herpes.

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Why did the blind man drown? Because he couldn't swim.

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What do you call a man who just came home from a 72-hour work shift ? You don't call him, you let him sleep.

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If through some strange space-time paradox, Chuck Norris ever had to fight himself, Chuck Norris would-- What am I saying, that would never happen!

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What did Stephen Hawking say about Stephen Hawking Anti-jokes? "They're stupid".

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Whats funny? Nick Sotelo

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whats worse than the holocaust? Nothing you should be worrying about the future not the past.

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I dream of a world where chickens can cross the road without having their motives questioned

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What is fat and ugly? Your American MUM!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops