Why did the woman hate waiting in line? Two reasons really: almost an entire day had passed since her last intake of non-prescription drugs plus she was generally apprehensive that the witness would identify her.

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A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

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What do you call cheese thats not yours? Somebody elses cheese

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a man walks into a bar..... the man pulls out a gun and robs the place as he is exiting he bumps into a child the child falls in the street and is crushed by a bus. the bus in an attempt to avoid the child swerves and hits a maternity clinic next to a gas station that promptly explodes. the robber so distraught he trys to shoot himself but the gun misfired and the man was arrested and was raped repeatedly in prison...he now has aids...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a car.

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A black guy walks into a bar with a beatiful parrot on his shoulder. "Wow," says the bartender. "That is really something. Where'd you get it?" The parrot was his fathers. Do to severe mental and physical illness, he can no longer take care of it. He asked his son to take it, those were his last words as he slipped into a coma

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Cheese on toast.

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Did you know Dr Pepper isn't really a doctor?

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Why is Justin beaber so white? Because his mother and father both are.

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Hey, I just met you And this is crazy, but you're getting too close And I'm about to file a restraining order, so back up, maybe?

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That's a lie, buffaloes are extinct now

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I came.

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How many women does it take to change a lightbulb? None, let the bitch cook in the dark.

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planking.

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Knock Knock. Whos there? Satan.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he died...

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What did Stephen Hawking say about Stephen Hawking Anti-jokes? "They're stupid".

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Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding a bomb in your apple.

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What's worse than a good anti-joke? A bad anti-joke.

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Two scientists walk into a bar. The first one says “I’ll have some H2O.” The second says “I’ll have some H2O too.” Then he dies.

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How do you make a napkin dance? You can't. Stop having such unrealistic aspirations.

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Why dont dinosaurs speak english? Because a meteor hit the earth and ran them into extinction

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Two blondes walk into a bar. There is a fat man there, but nobody talks to him

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Q: What is the difference between a black man and a Park bench? A: A park bench is an inanimate object.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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