Two blondes walk into a bar. There is a fat man there, but nobody talks to him

Knock knock! Who's there? Dick! Dick who? Dick Stewart, your neighbor from next door!

An Arab walks into a bar. He then blows up the bar.

Abraham Lincoln was the 16th Presient of the United States of America. The president to follow him was Andrew Johnson, president number 17.

obama is a good president

American Idol

Why can't stars marry? Because they are masses of incandescent gas and thus have no feelings.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have Alzheimer's. Where are the keys?

why cant the black man vote? because hes not 18 yet.

How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a light bulb? To get to the other side!

What's silver and bad for your teeth? A wrench

How do you get a clown off a swing? Hit it in the face with an axe

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens have feeble minds and tend to wander around.

A black guy and a Mexican are sitting in a car who's driving??? The Cops

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? I don't know. I wasn't there.

SAD STORY: Boy: Make me a sandwich. Girl: No.

When life gives you Lebanon, make lebanonanade.

Yo moma is so fat. yep.

Women's Rights

a little girl is playing outside of her house when i man in a van approaches her and stops to ask if the girl will help him find his puppy and that he has some gandy. seeing as the girl has a great love for animals she gets in the van. the man and the little girl drive around until they find the puppy. the man is so overjoyed her rewards the girl with candy. he then drives her back to her house and she feels wonderful having helped the man find his puppy. the end.

WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

How many small children does it take to change a light bulb? None. Children are not old enough to do this by themselves.

If I crash my car, how many trees does it take to cover my yard in orange juice, yellow, because a cat pissed on my foot.

A young girl walks out of a bar then gets raped.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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