Why was the man arrested? He had brutally stabbed 398 people in a 10 hour period.

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Your mother is so fat.... I am happy to see her join our exercise group.

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What do you call a teacher that gets wasted? A wasted teacher.

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A man comes home from the office, walks inside and hangs up his coat and hat at the door. He walks into the kitchen to find his wife has not made dinner instead she is drinking with friends, she tells him that she would have made dinner but she didnt want to. Furious, the man storms to the door, grabs his coat and leaves... He gets in his car and drives down to the pub. Sitting there drinking his beer, trying to calm down he finds a peice of paper tucked into his coat pocket, he unfolds it and reads it. It turns out to be a memo he wrote to remind himself at work that day.

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What did the penny say to the other penny? Nothing, because pennies can't talk.

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How do u know when someone is horny? look at there pants

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Knock knock Who's there? Forever alone Forever alone who? You.

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how do you take a shit in public? pull down your pants and push in public

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What did the banana say to the bear? Nothing, banana's can't talk.

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What's the difference between a lamborghini and a sackful of dead babies? one is a car and the other is a grotesque travesty.

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sticks and stones may break my bones but cataracts will prohibit you from eyesight

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When Jesus came back from the dead the first thing he said was "It was just a prank bro!"

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Where does a leper go every Monday and Wednesday? The dermatologist.

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What makes the turtle move? It's legs.

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Knock knock GET OUTTA HERE! Jesus Christ dude I just came for some eggs!....

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what do you call a sock that is no longer white a dirty sock

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Why did the boy fall in the hole? He had no eyes

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How many unicorns does it take to change a light bulb? 17. 11 if its Tuesday.

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What's the difference between a black man and water? All black men have water in them, but not all water has a black man in it.

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A sick patient asks a doctor, "will i be able to play my guitar?" The doctor replies, "of course you will be able to". "Good because that is my only form of income", says the patient.

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Rebecca Black.

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A blonde walks into a store and asks for the microwave behind the counter. The man behind the register promptly hands her the microwave and charges her $435 for it, which is utterly ridiculous.

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A blonde's house is on fire so she calls the fire department and they ask her how to get there. She gives them the address, but they hear her wrong and she dies a horrible fiery death.

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What s faster than a black guy with a TV? His brother with a VCR.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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